Okay, first things first, a little bit of housekeeping about the mangoes. I was on vacation last week, and the clips episode dropped, and I was listening to it, and I was like, that's right, those mangoes. And then I went for a run, and then I got a call from Jeff, and he was like, this is a really great day. You're missing a really great day. And I knew that I was missing a recording episode, but it was Alicia talking about wine news or some bull. So I didn't really think I was missing out on anything. Bulls in the news. Yeah. Bulls in the news. And Jeff was like, Talking hooch. Jeff was like, they, no, they brought a cake and really good bourbon and really good tequila. And I'm like, that all sounds great. And he's like, people are happy and talking. And I'm like, well, you definitely don't want me to come now. And then he goes, and they brought these mangoes. And I'm just like, oh, that's right, you weren't here for the mangoes. I was sitting at my house on vacation alone, considering coming to work. Bro, you hit down the street, why didn't you just come? Comradery. Cause I don't want to do that to everybody. No, I mean, if anyone is gonna come in to work on their free time on paid vacation, it's you. I had already come into the office two days out of the previous four. I couldn't do it again. The cyber sucked every email thread, too. Fortunately, Chris gave an extra mango to Bogdan. Bogdan got too hung over to eat it, and he brought it in. And I tried to eat his mango. How good was that mango? It was super good. And you guys complained about it being too sulfuric and stuff. After, like by Tuesday, like after four more days, it was great. Oh, it had to have been liquid by then. It was very mushy. Mine were like just total slop mush the next day. And my car smelled like sulfur for two days. And I had three mangoes in it. I mean, your car kind of smells like sulfur most of the time. If that's a fart joke, I got a new car recently and you haven't been in it, so f**k you. It's just the smoke of hell. That's all. Although my new car has cloth seats, so it's really soaking it all up. Yeah. Just christen that vehicle with sulfur Pakistani mangoes. Way to get it off the, what do they do? I don't know, hit it with the champagne. How did this all come about? You just ordered these? Yeah. I just ordered them because it just popped into my head, and I checked online, and it was basically the very end of the season. I think I got the last shipment of the Anwar Ratul mangoes. Where do you get these things from? There's like three different kinds. Yeah. Well, they came from Pakistan, but there are a couple companies you can order online from. Oh, they literally came from Pakistan? Yeah. Did you not listen to any of this? Yeah. Roger, you were in the room for the conversation all of those times. That they had it. It's just when I talk about fruit, he just assumes it's complete bulls**t, so he just doesn't commit it to memory. That's fair. That's fair and reasonable. Just because some fruit has its origin somewhere, like I just bought some leachies the other day, and they were from Mexico. Yeah, but were they called Mexican leachies? Yeah, but whatever. Yeah, this is terrible. Really Pakistani mangoes. So that's why they called, what were they? $10 a piece? Something like that, yeah. Well, by the time you got me it, the thing was, I think it like hyper-aged in your car or something. Yeah, Roger had nothing but criticism for it. Big shock. Yeah. Well, ironically, I brought the last- Sucked the fun out of a bag of mangoes. They came in a box. Oh. I greatly enjoyed mine, and thanks to having COVID twice, I didn't smell any sulfur in my ears. Well, I brought the last two home, and they were left, I think, because they were underripe, seemingly, but they were still green the next morning, and I cut them anyway, and they were the best of the bunch, I thought. Really? They had all of that succulent sweetness and richness, but there was some balancing acidity to them, which had been ripened out of all the other ones. It was just fat, juicy mango-ness. Yeah, it really made it a little more exciting to eat. Nice. Well, and I devoured both of them in short order. Of course. I think the point here is, I love you guys. All right. Mango old business out of the way. Can we roll it and get started? You are listening to another episode of Barrel to Bottle, The Binny's Podcast. I'm Jim, I do communications and pop culture stuff for the Binny's Corporation. Yeah, right. Join with me today. First pop culture trivia quiz, who says that nonstop every time he introduces the show? You're a part of pop culture, Roger. I'm Roger, I do beer, seltzer, hard iced tea. Pop culture icon. Long drink. Sparkling CBD cans. No, I don't touch CBD with a 10-foot pole. Go smoke legal weed. Hey, I'm Pat. I drink room temperature vermouth. Hi, I'm Chris. I do wine and all the things aforementioned and worse. Warm vermouth. Yeah. I'm Jenna. I get interrupted by Pat, and also some communications once in a while. I'm Greg, and I lost my pen. Do you guys see my pen? You got a cocktail to stir down there? Yeah. All right. I don't think we've ever had six people on the show before, so this is scary. Yeah, we have. We have. We've had some many years of clusters. Not only that, but this is absurd. Jim is standing behind an array, a skyline of bottles, and they don't make any sense in context next to each other, so what's going on, buddy? Oh, and a bag of skittles. And a bag of skittles. Mostly, there's almost just a few left over because Billy spilled them all over the place. A few weeks ago, there was an episode we did with Rosé and Jalapeno, and that came from an article that we had been forwarded, and it reminded me of the 30 Rock cocktail, the Old Spanish, which is red wine, olives, and tonic water. It's really gross. I'm like, there's a few fictional cocktails out there, so I started digging and I thought that would be a fun episode. We're going to try an Old Spanish, right? We are going to try an Old Spanish. Oh, good. Yeah. Where's the wine? I've gussied these up a little bit. Many of them didn't have actual recipes. I was like, I'll just make stuff up. I did some research and found some cocktails. I actually want to start with the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Hitchhiker's Guide. You love Douglas Adams. Pat loaned me a Douglas Adams book a couple of years ago. Yeah. And then you loaned it to Jeff and I never got a bag. Actually. I'm sorry. It's a classic of intergalactic British humor. I was very surprised that Chris Spear did not have his own Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster recipe. Yeah. I've had one for about 20 years. I've been honing it. What you want to do is sub in. I'm sharing it. Yeah. I sourced the Arcturian Megagen myself, like something like that. But he didn't. So I looked online at a couple of different recipes and I came up with my own. So in the book, it's described with a bunch of ingredients that do not exist. Old Jenks, spirits, water from the sea of Satragenus 5. Oh, we're going to have to bleep some of that. Arcturian Megagen, previously mentioned, Arcturian Megagen, marsh gas bubbling through it from the marshes of Follia, a float of Quolactin hypermint extract, redolent of the heavy odors of the dark Quolactican zones. Then you drop in the tooth of an Algolian sun tiger, watch it dissolve, spread the fires of the Algolian suns deep into the heart of the drink. Sprinkle Xanthor, add olive. I can't wait to watch this happen. Well, I mean, I've mixed a lot of it. Guys, he has fire. So what I did was I made my own Algolian sun tiger tooth. I made a sugar cube with sparkly sugar and some spoon coloring, and I just made it into a tooth shape. It's, of course, melted, and then I'm dousing it in a little bit of absinthe and hot sauce. I'm going to light that on fire now. Yes. Oh, boy. I assume some of these fictional cocktails are made with real things, but you have to take liberties with literally every ingredient on this recipe. All right, it's on fire. We have fire at work. It's on fire. Primitive stage of humanity has been reached. This is the first time we've had anything on fire on the podcast. On purpose. Oh, it's really going there. It is? Oh, yeah. It's doused in some hot sauce. You can see the sugar bubbling. Yeah. It's called caramelization. Snake oil hot sauce. Made of fish peppers. I'm going to blow this out now. Thanks for all the fish. Peppers. Okay. Well, don't you need a translator fish in your ear? Yes. So, and the writer said, so long and thanks for all the fish. That's what the whale said when they left Earth. So, or no, the dolphins, I'm sorry. So, I'm going to put that in. He really has the whole kit. He really does. Everything, everything. He's putting quality Chicago cubes into a shaker. They're not Chicago cubes. Oh, he's putting some dog s*** ice into a cocktail shaker. I'm just going to scoop some of that tiger in there, that tiger tooth. It looks lumpy and wet and brown. And it's yellow. It does not look appetizing. It really smells like absinthe. Yeah, so there's two cocktails that have absinthe and it is really strong. Well, you burn most of the alcohol off of that one. So, and then I- How much lemon juice did you just add to that? That looked like half a pint. No, no, that's also Everclear, good for the Jenks spirit. Oh, that makes it better. Geneva? Yes. You want the Arcturine Megagen, and you must be properly iced or the benzene is lost. I don't know what that means. So I'm just using Geneva. Or I thought that was just an interesting alternative. And then some gin. How do we use gin but make it weirder and less palatable? Yeah. Add benzene rings. If you're playing along at home, Jim is going to put these recipes up on the blog, the Binny's blog. So look for that. Maybe in the show notes too. So good luck. Yeah. Serve that over ice. It is pretty. Yeah, it has a glow to it. That's why it's still on fire. So whatever the hell this stuff is. What's that? I don't know. Xamfor. It's a real thing. A little baggy. Xamfer, master of the pan flute. Wow. What the olive? Really handsy over here, Jim. Who gets this kind of utensil? Just plop it in. I think it looks okay. I think it looks like a cocktail. It looks like a liqueurite. It looks like a really vodka-y screwdriver. Do you want to get a photo of it before we? No, make him make another one. It truly is glowing. I have a feeling I'm going to need a spit cup for this. So do you have to gargle it and then blast it? It's kind of gross. It smells. Maybe Jim, what is actually? Genevier, grain alcohol and absinthe. And genep. And genep too? A little bit of genep with lemon juice. It smells trade Cosmos. I need to top it with spring water. It smells like Mountain Dew. That was the last part of it. Oh, you didn't top it with Pellegrino. The color is rather suggestive. It does kind of smell like Mountain Dew. It's the most expensive Mountain Dew you'll ever drink. Right. You're right. This does taste like grandma. Topped with mineral water. I forgot about that. Oh, well, the mineral water would definitely pull this all together. It already has a very salty edge. It does. It tastes better with mineral water. It's got electrolytes. It's what plants crave. All right. I don't hate you as much as I assumed I was gonna hate you. It's a little hot. It's a lot of absinthe. It's a little hot and a little salty. It's so salty. Why is it so salty? It's like vaguely citric pickle brine. That's liquid and it was in my mouth. Okay, this was the gag one, right? The rest of them are gonna be okay. This is not that bad. What? You trashed all of those Amaro's and this is enjoyable to you? I mean, what the hell is wrong with you? It's really absinthe forward. No one likes absinthe. Everyone always says they think they would, but they don't. I love absinthe. You like absinthe? That is not my problem with this. It's the olive brine that's the problem. Also the- Mixed with all the sugar. The tooth. Yeah, the tooth had both sugar and salt in it. Oh, well, there you go. That's why it's so salty. And what did you sprinkle on the top? More salt. Cocktail salt. Why is this so salty? Every sip makes me more thirsty. Just a little bit of salt. It's a salt. It's salt. I once had some salt and this is saltier than the salt. What are the dark specks floating in it? That's the cocktail salt. The cocktail salt is, I don't know, it just has little edible sparklies in it. Edible sparklies. It's kind of making my stomach churn. Yeah, that's something. Okay, but lemon coated in gold through the back of your skull? Yeah, I don't know about that. No, it's more like a lemon that I ate and I shouldn't have and it's turning around in my stomach. I think it could use more lemon and less salt. But I think everything else is okay. Maybe exactly the same amount of salt, but a whole bunch of more other stuff. Or less salt and the same amount of lemon, I don't know. Yeah, I wouldn't mind it as is with just less salt. And maybe less absence. This cocktail salt includes kosher salt, sugar, turmeric, caramel color, and purple grape. There you go. Purple grape, all right. Mega purple. I think this needs rum. I bet it would be more interesting with rum. There's rum right here, pour some rum into it. And tell us it doesn't suck just as bad. Well, so much hate. To Roger's point, I think the alcohol really speaks of that grain alcohol. It's just like hot. Yeah. I don't know and I didn't really know what to do with that. I guess I could have just gotten a stronger rum maybe, maybe a OFTD. It wouldn't have been true to form then. True to what? Zephyr and Beabelbrex is like, you can't sub in to Everclear. Yeah. I mean, that's the closest thing I could find to old jank spirit, whatever that is. I mean, I think it's kind of remarkable. You used all these expensive things and you basically created like citrus gatorade. With no health claims. I think I'm ready to try something else now. So, that one was pretty bad. So, I'm gonna move on to, I'm gonna go out of order here. I'm gonna go on, which I think is, this one I actually think is pretty good. It's the Screaming Viking from Cheers, season six, episode one, of course. Oh, obviously. They're trying to get a new bartender fired. This is after Sam leaves the bar, he leaves the bar and sells it, and he returns, and they have a new bartender, and they all have to wear bartender outfits, old-timey, but probably Roger and Chris have those outfits. They wear them together. I was going to mention my Zephyr and Beabelbrock's cosplay channel on fans, only fans earlier. I do do the old-timey bartender too. Of course. So anyway, so yeah, so they all have to wear those, and there's a bet, he says he knows every cocktail. If someone comes in with one he doesn't know, he'll quit. So they just, there's a con, they trick him and they ask for a Screaming Viking, and there's no indication at all what it is other than it has a cucumber, and they ask Norm if he wants it bruised or not, and he goes bruised. Wait, so this is another Jim makes up a cocktail? Yes. But I think this one is actually good. This one is actually good, I think. I imagine Norm's cucumber was bruised on the regular. Yes, absolutely. So it's rum, dry vermouth, lime juice, simple syrup, muddled with simple syrup, and then tonic water. Well, that sounds highly drinkable. What's wrong with you? Say that again. Rum, dry vermouth, lime juice, and then muddled cucumber and simple syrup. This sounds gross. It sounds like a tiki cocktail with a cucumber and some vermouth. And rum? I don't know, let's find out. That doesn't sound like a tiki cocktail. Jim, unlike them, I appreciate your hard work today, and I'm looking forward to trying this cocktail. All right. You're using the lime juice? Yeah, lime juice. And rum, what rum are you using? El Dorado 3R that's been on Roger's desk for three years. That makes it six years old, right? And Dolan Blanc, not dry. Yes. Oh, Blanc. That's much different. Sorry. Okay. And probably better in this one. I'm more open to this now. Yeah. I just went through a healthy amount of Dolan Blanc. I thought I was drinking classic martinis, but Pat says I was drinking martinezes. You've failed your martini test. That cucumber looks ridiculously intact. It's a big hunking. Heat it up a little bit. Is that actually bruised? No. I guess we're not getting the norm treatment. Only the regulars get that. Oh, we are getting the double strain, though. Oh, yeah. Very nice. Look at this fancy guy. Double strained into double old fashioned. Yep. What's the difference between a double old fashioned and a rocks? The height. So it's a little taller than a rocks class. Yeah. I had to use the double strain because those seeds were getting everywhere. Wait, lime seeds? What? Cucumber seeds. Cucumber seeds? Cucumber seeds. You muddle some cucumber in the cocktail. Yes. I think that's part of it. I see. I think if you can either muddle it or just set it in there and I don't know. I was expecting it to just be manhandled like Roger squeezing his juices. Just beating it at the table or something. Just wrap your paws around it, give it a good clench. But we're in the conference room without the sink. So Jim, you had pre-batched lime juice, muddled cucumber and El Dorado three year in that shaker pint. Strained it over ice onto the cucumber in a double rocks glass. And this adding tonic water. Copying it with tonic. I only wish you had devised a messier way to disseminate these cocktails. Jim is artfully pouring these cocktails into the appropriate glass. And then we're pouring them sloppily into little plastic sample glasses because. This is delicious. I think this is delicious. Well, it's redolent of cucumber. I was pulling up a picture of this guy. I want to see how ridiculous his outfit looks. You definitely have that outfit. He looks like. No, he looks like he works at Bennigan. I was about to say. He looks like a Bennigan's outfit. Shachki's outfit. This is really good. This is phenomenal. Yeah, I think it's a good cocktail. Shut up. Where's the tonic water? Especially today where it's like 90 degrees outside. Shut up. Roger has the tonic water. It's like a gin and tonic with a little more cucumber and a little more citrus. Screw you, Roger. It's nice. Yeah, it's good. Rum. Yeah. Blanco rum. I think I can endorse this. Yeah. I'm enjoying this. That's your summer sipper right there. I think so. Absolutely. It's so sweet. It's a little sweet. But I think it was a good call to choose that Indian tonic. Yeah. Because that really brings a bitter element to it. Favorite treat beverage. Favorite treat beverage. Jim, you've made a drinkable cocktail. All right. All right. Woo-hoo. That is the bruised Viking. What kind of Viking? Screaming Viking. Screaming Viking. And did we get a bruised? It was bruised, yeah. It was bruised. Okay. You need some dill in this. Roger, are you going to eat this pickle? Boo on the dill idea. Maybe if I tried it, I'd like it. Cucumber and dill goes together, and they love dill in Scandinavian countries. I don't know what it has to do with vikings though as a show set in Boston. I don't know why they didn't call it the screaming Irishman. It's a kooky non-sequitur in an 80s comedy. Yeah. But that fresh anisey flavor of dill would be really nice. Fresh dill. Yeah. We want an anisey flavor. We got to- How about anise? Just throw some absinthe in there, brand new absinthe out of there. Throw more absinthe. All right. All right. Pretty good, Jim. All right. That gets two thumbs up. Okay. Out of 12 in the room. Who's are they? All right, so next, The Flaming Homer, slash Flaming Moe, yes. Let's all go to flaming Moes. Which of course is a satire of the aforementioned Cheers. So this one again is kind of a tough one, because Homer just mixes a bunch of, he's out of beer because Patty and Selma are over showing him slideshows of their trip to the Dead Sea. And of course, they're floating in the Dead Sea. Hey, doll, here's Patty floating in the Dead Sea. And the hairy legs are floating in the Dead Sea. So it has tequila, it has schnapps, it has creme de menthe, and it has children's cough syrup. Oh, nice. Did you bring some? I made my own. So crusty bread, non-narcotic cough syrup. So it never replaced purple drying. Yeah, so it's non-narcotic, so I know it's not gonna put you out. So that was concern one, is that I can make something that didn't have barbiturates in it. I told them to. You told me to. It's non-narcotic, I gotta stick as much as I can. So how are we gonna lean the rest of the day? So I did blanco tequila, dark rum, Matilda Framboise instead of schnapps. And then I made a cough syrup with grape simple syrup, which is just grape juice and sugar reduced down, and then some genapie instead of the creme de menthe. And then it's supposed to light on fire. I don't think this is gonna light on fire. I don't think so, yeah. And then I don't know if I want to pour a little Everclear on top. To get it to light on fire? Yeah. But the fire made it taste good. I know, I know. Will the Everclear float on top? I don't know, so. I doubt it. You might have to like light it in a spoon. Yeah, light it in a spoon. The best way to go about this is just light it as you're pouring it. Well, technically the best way. In the stream that's coming out of the bottle. We'll see what happens. We lost another room. Yeah, don't do that. Put it in a spoon and then light the spoon on fire. Who has the extinguisher on hand? Anybody got the extinguisher? I really got to pee. There's that red thing on the ceiling that says fire. I think that's fine. There's sprinklers. I don't know if I should actually light this on fire. Why shouldn't you? I don't think we can pull up short on something called the flaming jib. Are you kidding me? We already lit one on fire. We might as well. There's a sprinkler directly above you. Let's all go to flaming home. Cocktail shaker here. Jim is doing the old school bartending method of a shaker pint. Why they have that name. How do you think I should light this thing on fire? He's done both. I think you should take that bar spoon, fill it with Everclear and then torch it. Precisely. Light that and pour it. Then I drizzle it in. Flaming Hover achieved. I always wondered this since I was a kid. What's that? What this drink was like. What a full heart tasted like. Yeah. This is amazing. It's an iconic Simpsons episode. It is. Absolutely is. You said the cough syrup, which is fundamental to this and fire, you made it with just grape simple syrup or with other components too? Luxardo, Maraschino Le Corp. See, that makes so much sense to me. That makes sense, yeah. I want to try that cough syrup on its own. I was going to say. I think we need to know what that component tastes like. Now we're getting service. Well, there is cough syrup involved. Shall I pass this down? It certainly has a cough syrupy aroma to it, so mission accomplished. Does it loosen your phlegm? Does your phlegm feel loosened? Absolutely. Okay, so to give everyone the experience, this drink smells red, as red as it looks, a purplish red. It tastes purple. It kind of smells like a tiki drink without rum, so there's like a little spice component, and then there's a lot of that red fruit that you would expect, and no citrus. It's just syrup. Yeah. There's like smoky tequila taste though. What's the, is there tequila in this? It was on fire. I mean, it definitely tastes like tequila. It's just Blanco tequila. And there's dark rum, and the rum is Mauritius. I gave him a bottle of New Grove Dark, which is a Mauritius rum. It smells very molasses brown sugar. I feel like there's a strong Hawaiian punch component to the flavor. Yes, exactly. That's what I mean. It smells red. Yeah, for sure. It's a little too sweet for my taste, but otherwise, it's an interesting fruity drink. And if it was on- It's palatable for sure. If it was on crushed ice, like a snow cone or something, you would make a lot of sense of it. Yeah, for sure. You got to get that good ice. Big pineapple wedge sticking out of it. I have the Sonic Pebble ice, you mean? As is often the case, Jim, lime is the answer. Lime. Yeah. Give it the cut. Do we have lime? I have a good left. Okay. This has lemon juice in it. Roger can always squeeze you some more. A little more lemon and it would be. Or I think even lime instead of lemon. Either way, but just a little more acidic cut. You know what? I bet it's good with some bubbles added to it. I was just going to say maybe some soda water would be. It does loosen the phlegm. Using that spoon was a good substitute for the narcotic component in cough syrup. That's true. Reminded me of the old days. You know what? I like it better without the mineral water in it. All right. Up next. All right. Flamin Homer. It seriously loosens the phlegm. I'm giving it one thumbs up. Yeah, I agree with that. One thumb. One thumb. I think this could be modified to be- Do you want to try the cough syrup? Yes. Yeah. Because I think the cough syrup is a really big component here. There's a lot of that concord grape care. Yeah. Oh, wow. That is syrupy, huh? Hey, Jim knows simple syrup. We have learned this. It might be. I think that that is probably a good portion of why it's so sugary. Crusty is non-narcotics spelled with a K. I told you, man. Wow. You nailed it. It's a pretty good- It tastes like cough syrup, yeah. It's that weirdly minty Luxardo, marxino liqueur, and then candy grape, fake ass grape. It's a very nice color. Yeah. I mean, it looks like cough syrup. I think you got to cut back on this in the recipe. Yeah. Yeah, I think so. But it's all Homer had. Wow, that is syrupy. Yeah. Good job, Jim. Thank you. Let's market that. Mr. Binstein's non-narcotic cough syrup with a K. I spilled some of it on the table. I'm going to stick to the table. There's a big one. There you go. Thank you. Just don't get it on your beautifully white shirt. I don't know why I always wear white shirts to these things. Because you're mad. Mad as a matter, I say. Sometimes after red wine tastings, I look like a serial killer on the way home. Okay, next up is the One of Everything cocktail from The Office, season five, episode 11, of course. Of course, of course. It's the Moroccan Christmas episode where they have a Moroccan-themed Christmas. I don't understand why Phyllis is running the Christmas party, because she's blackmailing Angela, who is cheating on Andy with Dwight. So she's blackmailing her to let her run the party. They have to have the Moroccan. She takes control of the party planning committee, yes. It has the Moroccan Christmas, and of course, Angela is very angry about it. So, and they have alcohol. So Michael makes Meredith, who is the office drunk, he makes her equal parts Scotch, abstinth, rum, gin, vermouth, and triple sec with two Splenda packets. I think I already had the long-ended ice tea on the show. I can't wait to try this. So I'm an infinity jugger that all the time. Non-ending long-ended ice tea. So in honor of the Fruit Kings, I swapped out Splenda for Monk Fruit Sweetener. Monk Fruit Sweetener. Then Scotch is Benriac 10, Absinthe, Stiggan's Fancy for the rum. This gin, Pat gave me Whitley, Neal, Rhubarb, Ginger. Oh, God. He asked for a flavored gin. And then some Dolan Blanc. What's with the Stiggan's Fancy? It's the pineapple plantation. Is pineapple supposed to be in here? No, but it's rum. I wanted some flavor because all of those together, it's going to just be crap. I think they're all going to taste good this way. It's like all of them. There's a chance it could be interesting. They call it the Three Stooges Effect. It's all of the diseases trying to get through the door at the same time, and Mr. Burns is invincible. They're all going to cancel each other out and make this wonderful Long Island Icy style cocktail. So it's just a mixed cocktail, just a stirred cocktail. I'm going to stir it in my little ball jar here. It's in the jar? What was the vessel in the show? I don't know. A copper glass. Yeah. They were at the office. I assume it was a plastic fork or a plastic spoon, stirring it, or a pen maybe. All right. So just all that stuff is going to go in there. I had it yesterday. I want to see what you guys think of it. I feel like that's a trap. I had it. I'm still alive. Yeah. I had it. I won't tell you what I think about it, but I had it. With these same ingredients? Yeah. I don't know about the scotch. The scotch is going to make it weird. I think the absinthe makes it weird. Well, that is a lot of absinthe. Yeah. Half an ounce of absinthe. Yeah. No wonder Meredith gets super drunk and has to, Michael tries to take her to rehab in the episode. Maybe we should all make a reservation right now. Wow, this really stinks like absinthe. Yeah. It really takes everything over. Yeah. Are we supposed to put tonic water on top of this too? No. Well, everybody enjoy your black jelly bean cocktail. Oh, wow, yeah. Dude, I'm getting the scraps from every cocktail today. Okay, honestly, I'm not really complaining. You guys, now that everybody has this, just like the Long Island iced tea, they all cancel each other out. This drink is really good. This drink is really good. I like it too. It's dead on good and plenty. Yeah, it is. Good and plenty to drink. I don't mind it. What did you end up using for the monk fruit sweetener? But it's essentially tastes like Splenda. So it is, get me to a monastery. Yeah, it does have that like Splenda-y flavor, which I'm not a fan of. Yeah, this just tastes like the anise candies I don't like. It tastes like sugar-free good and plenty. And it has a little fruity, well, that's probably the good and plenty, too. It's got a little fruity grape-y-ness at the bottom, too. This is terrific. I like this. This is so drinkable. I would just make it with real sugar. Yeah. So that's probably why Meredith had a bunch of these in her hair caught on fire. I mean, it probably doesn't. You probably don't even need the sugar or sweetener in general, I would say. Yeah. But this is palatable, but I'm going to pass. No thumbs from me. It's two Splenda packets, which is kind of hard to measure out. So I just put in a... That's a lot. It's probably a teaspoon. It's like two teaspoons, which is a lot. Way more than you need. The Monkford packets are small. There's not a lot in there. I don't know if Monkford is sweeter. It's sweeter than sugar. Yeah, so I probably didn't add as much, but... Man. All right, Chris, what do you garnish this with? A good and plenty. Good and plenty. Just dump them in there. You don't think like a lime wedge or some kind of citrus fruit? Yeah, I think you're gonna do that. I think a citrus actually would help this, but cut through a little bit. But it's a little bit sweet. But other than that, with all... Listen, he put f***ing scotch in here. I know. Where is the scotch? He put gin in here. And it's equal parts. Equal parts. It's just absent. It's just like destroying everything. All you taste is absent. What is the Long Island Ice Tea Principle, where they just cancel each other out and taste okay? A splash of Coke on top of here? Yeah, but there's nothing like absent than a Long Island Ice Tea, right? No, no. Yeah, so absent, I think it's just like... Tequila and bourbon. Yeah, I think if you maybe did like a rinse of absent, it would probably be pretty similar. You know what this might be good is if you did all the same ingredients, but instead of the sugar, mix it in with that grapefruit soda from Fever Tree, that could be good. I definitely think you could leave the sweetener element out entirely. Yeah. That just might do it. I think that's just a gag for the show. Well, so this whole drink was a gag for the show? This whole episode is a gag for me, for everything. Joke's on you, NBC. We tried it. And two out of six Barrel to Bottle people liked it. Three? Nobody hated it. Roger probably hated it. It's just too sweet. Absinthe is so polarizing because so many people don't like that. It just takes over everything it touches. I mean, I don't like it usually, but here it's definitely, yeah, just more of like that liquorice candy where I think it's more palatable. It opens up. Now we use St. George Absinthe. Are you going to submit this cocktail to their social media and see if they pick it up? To one of everything. No, it may be up to the credit. I'll bangalack the gargle blaster where I lit their Absinthe on fire. Cannot recommend that one. I think it's a better way to make that cocktail. I think it's just, it needs a little work, which is what I was supposed to be doing. Rome wasn't built in a day. Yeah. The next one is the Old Spanish from 30 Rock. There's season seven, final season of the show. Matthew Broderick's character, Cooter Burger, returned to the show. He was named Cooter Burger, he was nicknamed by George Bush because he looked like a turtle and one time he ate a burger. So, he was called Cooter Burger. Cooter Burger sounds pretty delicious. It's a good, yeah, it is, yeah, it's a turtle burger. So, he ordered an Old Spanish cocktail, which was red wine, olives, and tonic water, which sounds really disgusting. And as I said at the beginning, you know, Chris recommended the Proto-Colo. That's not red. No, it is not. It's a rosé, but I was inspired by the rosé and jalapeno episode. To kind of class this up a little bit. It's made with red grapes, so, yeah, it's fine. Tempranillo and bobal. And then I've got the Binny's brand. What are those olives stuffed with? The finest olives that get given away with select purchases. What is it? It's green in there. It's not pimentos. Oh, it's a jalapeno. It's a jalapeno stuffed olive. Are you doing enough olives for everyone? You can have mine, Greg. This is gonna be a dirty Spanish. A dirty old Spanish. Old dirty Spanish. Big baby Jesus. Change his name to old dirty Spanish. So, and also a little bit of trivia for you all. The old Spanish was also ordered at an episode of Mad Men after the 30 Rock episode. It was just kind of fun. Oh man, he's holding up one of those International House of Pancakes juice carafe. Carafes. And it has- It's an Italian restaurant, wine carafe. Yep, and it has olives floating around. Well, I said International House of Pancakes. That covers it all. I think they're dancing on the bottle. They do. It does look like a mad scientist's jar of eyeballs. Who taught those olives flamenco? And then we're going to top this with tonic water. Oh my God. At least we still have half a bottle of Proto-Colo Rosé. Wait, how do I get an olive, damn it? You might as well just take one out yourself. We need some pickers. And I top this with tonic? Yes, top it with tonic water. Like just a splash or? I don't know. Do you have any more plastic cups? There are no hard and fast rules here. There are no hard and fast rules with any of these cocktails. Greg needs more cups. We need more cups. Yeah. And maybe the Rosé was a mistake because it's getting more and more green as it sits. As we will be to around the gills. I guess I'll take a fresh cup. You know, I really want to accurate. I just want this not to taste like anise. Well, yeah, I need a cup too. Mission accomplished. We're passing the cups around. I might have overdone my tonic. Oh, wow. You get the most- Certainly smells bright. You get the most olive-y. Jim now has the bottle and it has just the dregs of half a bottle of Proto-Cola Rosé and somehow more olives than there were in the bottle. We didn't get it. I mean, yeah, no one got olive support out. I can almost definitively say that I hate this. Yeah. Maybe I'm just not getting a lot of olive because to me, it just tastes like watered-down rosé, a little bitter from the- I was thinking club soda might have been a better choice. Okay, yeah. But I don't know. Yeah, this is kind of gross. But it would be less Spanish if it was club soda. What? It's not good. We probably should have started with it. I can't believe it. I'm the only person who will be like, yeah, I'd drink this. Are you? Mike, you like it. You would drink this? I mean, I'd like a drink and I have no other options right now. So down the hatch it goes. Yeah. When you're home alone and you can't make it to the store and it's late, and you need something and this is all you have. No, because if this is all you have, then just drink the wine by itself. Why would you do this? Yeah. Let me try the wine before it got ruined. Is it better? Do you think it would taste worse with just red wine and an olive? Absolutely. Yeah. That would taste even worse. Yeah. I've had the other Spanish wine thing, the red wine and Coke before several times, and that's shockingly not horrible. I see I don't think this is horrible, it's just not good. Unless I didn't get a ton of brine, I think I'm with Pat, it's just okay, but it's not like- Because Chris is tasting the wine, and Pat is tasting the brininess and the fizz, wine people are going to look for the wine flavors and be like, this does not taste anything like what it's supposed to. The tonic turns the wine into a horrifically cheap, sh**ty wine. Well, even worse. It's a just fine cheap wine. Something that would be 6.99 at a gallon. Fronsio level. Yeah, the wine is nice. The drink is gasoline-esque. Forest service bathroom. Yeah. I want to get out of hand. It does pick up a notable amount of oil off the olive too. All right. Well, we've beaten this one to death. What's next? I just want you guys to know the rosé is not very good on its own. I mean, it's not terrible, but. No? Did you try it? Yeah. It's not great. Yeah. What do you know, Roger? It's like the loamiest cheap rosé I've ever. This rosé was terribly loamy. Yeah. It was quite possibly the loamiest rosé I've ever tasted. It means it tastes like dirt. Yeah. I know what loam is, but there's a lot of really cheap rosés. All right, so we've got two cocktails left. We've got Skittle Brow, which is kind of a do-it-yourself. Yeah, about time. You're just gonna just take a couple skittles, squeeze them up. Are you guys coordinating your skittle colors for your skittle brow? No. You're just putting in whatever? Get your paws out of the skittle bag and pass it already. Billy already dropped the skittles. They've been all over Jim's desk. They've been all over Jim's desk. Did he scoop them off the desk and put them back in the bag? I don't know, but I ate some off his desk later. He was eating them off the desk. He did not return them to the bag. I don't want them to be colored. Well, then it's going to turn brown. It's going to be very unappetizing. Chris, you're mixing green and orange? Come on. We just drink wine with green olives in it. I'm worried about my skittles making a drink unappetizing, but this wasn't. Roger won't even touch them. It's a random selection. What are you going to do? Roger's is going to be okay because at least they're all warm. Never mind. I want to taste the rainbow, baby. Yeah. You're going for it. Wurzburger Hoffbrau is the bear, just a German Pilsner. I tried it with a Hefeweizen and it was really bad. Not saying this is going to be any better. But it does bubble up like mentos and coke, so just watch it a little bit. So maybe I shouldn't have put five of these in my little cup. I also squeezed mine to get really open up the flavor of the skittle. Do you have a skittle smuggler? I don't. I just use my paws. Use your fingers. Oh, I'm barely strong enough to squeeze a skittle when it happens to me. I legitimately lost my pen. Weren't you showing off the guns just a week ago or something? Yeah, just because they exist doesn't mean they work. So this is from the Simpsons episode where Homer goes to the convenience store and asks for skittle brow, which is skittles and beer and a foo tells him that does not exist. That's really the joke, but I just thought it was funny. I always enjoyed that and nuts and gum are like my- Together at last. Together at last. I was going to serve nuts and gum with this, but I didn't have time to make it. Yeah, but then Homer says, okay, give me a six-pack of duff and a bag of skittles. I've actually had this before. Skittle brow? Yeah. In Germany? Yes, in the fatherland. No, in college. Okay. I wasn't expecting anyone to have had this before. Did you just put skittles in beer? Yeah. But are you surprised it's Roger out of all of us? I mean, it is the one exception to the Ryan Heights good boat, right? Yeah, it is. Did you guys know that skittles got rid of the lime flavor? Yes. It's a geninosis, but everyone else, I did not know that they got rid of lime and they changed it with green apple. Oh, lame. Right, so now lime is back. It's all over the bag. Don't worry, guys. It's the original lime up. The original lime up. Someone from Binny's wrote that, I think. That's for sure. Also, it's lime. Just within the last week, Mars was faced with a class action lawsuit that skittles are toxic. We were talking about it yesterday, and when I read that article, I went, man, I haven't had skittles in a while, and I bought the same one-pound bag that's in my kitchen right now. Now, with extra toxins. I'm going to poison myself. Jim, this is gross. Yeah, it's pretty gross. There's nothing to it. It doesn't taste like skittles. Does it depend on your skittle mixture? I feel like I wasted my skittle. I used three orange and one lime. Did you crack them open to get the essence out? Yes, I cracked them open. Okay. Don't have to tell you, I'm sorry. Mine's not the same color. Look how different the color of Rodney's beer is. Is the essence inside of them? Because mine are all white inside. Yeah, they're always white inside. The white color is coming off. Mine's kind of a reddish color. You know what's interesting? As time goes on, I think the fruity flavors are blending with the malt character and giving you a breakfast cereal, fruity pebble kind of character. So what I was going to say is we did some experiments. Oh, God, you're eating them? They get harder when they're in beer. Oh, yeah. You can't put anything in liquid. I've been stirring mine. It's getting a little fruitier. You got to let it sit for a while to really get the- I let the heffalos sit. Yeah, let it sit for our Skittle Brow expert here. I want to on record that my Skittles were unharmed and still taste delicious. They do get harder though. Why? Yeah. Haven't you ever put Skittles in like- Because they got cold. We have to do that. We have to put Skittles in ice water and then eat the Skittles and they were like, they were like breaking your teeth. Yeah, it was really dumb. I have only ever put Skittles- No, I never do that. You almost broke our teeth doing it. Who among us as 18-year-olds has not done something dumb like that? I have only ever put Skittles in my mouth. Wow, so all the color comes off them too, huh? Yeah. Well, yeah, it's in liquid. I'm getting more sugary flavor now. It's gross. All right, it's gross. Sorry, Homer. You were right on the flaming Homer, but you're wrong on this one. Agreed. Okay, the last one, Snake Juice. I don't know if anyone wants Parks and Rec. There's a place called the Snake Hole Lounge, and Tom Haverford, as he's on Sorry, is an investor. And so he invents a Kahlua-like liqueur that's 70 ABV. It's called Snake Juice. And so he invites the whole office there to sample it, and he wants them to talk it up and have guerrilla marketing where they're all saying how awesome it is, and then they all get drunk on it. There's a classic gif of Ron Swanson dancing with a little tiny pillbox hat on his head. Pretty classic gif. Well, this is where this episode goes off the rails. This is gonna go off the rails, yeah. So this is Everclear, cold brew coffee, chocolate syrup, and vanilla extract. You son of a bitch, I mean. So I am here for this. I did the calculations, and I tried to make it 70%, and it tasted like poison. It was awful. It was undrinkable. So I just put more cold brew and more syrup in it, so it's probably closer to like 50, which is still very high. And then I put it in the freezer overnight. Having a cold is definitely a key component of this. You can sip or shoot, or just smell, I don't know. So this is Jim's homemade Kahlua, you guys. I was at a bar once, and they handed me, out of a brown paper bag and a jar inside, homemade Baileys. And it was like under the bar. I don't think it was being kept cold. Sounds safe. Jim's homemade Kahlua snake hole, everybody. Cheers. Snake hole, what's this called? Snake juice. Snake hole to the face hole. Snake juice. Wow, that's hot. Yeah, it's pretty hot still. It's still pretty hot. I think it's great. This is great. You can take it home. Hershey's syrup and grain alcohol. Yep, but coffee too. No, it's kind of. It's fancy chocolate syrup. Binny's splurge for some fancy chocolate syrup. Oh, if this was one degree warmer, I don't think I'd be able to handle it, but all right. And it's been in the cooler for a little bit. It was right out of the freezer. I think it's way better. It's still pretty hot. When you were like in your 20s and somebody was like, you're dirty to take a shot. And now you know that it's like an 18% liqueur, but somehow it tasted like this. Like welcome to the grownup version of being in your 20s and getting a shot that you can't handle. That's what you're calling this? Do you have any tiny novelty hats? We could have danced. I'm sure we could find, we could dig one up. I can feel it burning my stomach. Yeah. Yeah. It's working. Snake juice. Tastes like burning. It looks like chocolate milk. I mean, I feel like it obviously just needs to get diluted more, like put it in with cream and. Yeah. So I finished mine. It was very strong. Yeah. No thanks. Back to the drawing board, Tom Haverford. Little too strong. I mean. A little too strong. Everclear is never the answer, listeners. That's a quitter's attitude. I mean, unless you're making your own schnapps, if you wanted to make this, use rum. Use like an OFTD. Yeah. I mean, I was trying to get to 70. And then I realized that that was a fool's. OFTD is like 140. Would have been perfect. No, no, 70% ABV. OFTD is like 128 now. They knocked it down. It was like 140, it was like 130 something. The Lacour itself is 70% ABV. So I needed to start high. You could start with 151. Right. Yeah. But then you wouldn't be able to add much of anything. Well, all you guys, stop for a second. Timout, you're arguing about how to get to this horrible target ABV. The ABV is the problem, not the solution. I was trying. It didn't work at all. So I just kept adding. Apparently, I can't, what do they say when there's noise? They're like, just filter it out or whatever. I can't do that with sounds. Little sounds drive me nuts, but apparently alcohol, I can and you can't. So just without all of that extra alcohol, the rest of this was really good. Chocolate and coffee together in a creamy body, it was wonderful and incredibly alcoholic. So if you did, if any other spirit is a base and the rest of these flavoring components, it would be terrific. Where's my tiny hat? We'll just strap a cup onto your hat and dance around. Thanks for this gross episode, Jim. This is my payback for editing out all of your ****ing unks. Jokes on you. We're going to do another one after this, and it's going to be a mess. Yeah. So listeners, which drinks did we miss from your favorite shows? That's right. And movies. This is mainly all TV shows. We're willing to make more fictional cocktails. Give us a few ideas. How about somebody's own recipe too? Maybe we could try some listener recipes. That's not a bad idea. I was hoping for some kind of Star Wars thing involving blue milk. I'm not going to lie. Unless there's an expanded universe or the now decanonized legends universe, I don't know any Star Wars cocktails. We don't want to get hung up on the wrong universe. We don't want to get mixed up in the canons at all. I mean, God. God forbid. Yeah. If you got any questions, send them in at Binny's Bev on the media of your choice or comments at binnys.com. If we answer your question, we'll give you 20 bucks. If we make your cocktail, you get nothing. I suppose it depends on how good the cocktail is. We'll be back in your feed next week. Something good. Until next time, Greg. Jenna. Roger. It's Pat. And Chris. I'm Jim. Keep tasting. Anyway, so far, this is a six-person s*** show.